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Submitted on
February 1, 2013
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Dear Wifeh aka Creamstar13.
I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our romance is over. I think I realized it when your dwarf bit me With George Bush and his wife and I saw you hit on my father. I'm sure you're ashamed enough to understand that I get turned on by garbage men. I'm returning your ring to you, but I'll keep  your mom as a memory. You should also know that I  get sick when I think of eggplant-fetishism.

F**k off now,
Rylin aka Sob


------------------


Dear (the last person who left a comment on your Journal).
I don't really know how to tell you this, but ___1___. I think I realized it when ___2______3___ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___. I'm sure you're ___6___ enough to understand ___7___. I'm returning ___8___ to you, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory. You should also know that I ___10___ ___11___.
___12___,
-Your name-


1. What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I'll join the monastery
Black - I dislike you
Green - Our horoscope doesn't match
Grey - You're a pervert
Yellow - I'm selling myself
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're a loser
Other - I'm in love with your sister


2. Which is your birth month?
January - That night
February - Last year
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
May - First of May
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When I threw up
August - When I saw the shrunken head
September - When we skinny dipped
October - When I quoted Santa
November - When your dog ran amok
December - When I changed tennis shoes


3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Pizza - In your camping car
Pasta - Outside of Chicago
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you ate enchilada
Chicken - In your closet
Kebab - With Paris Hilton
Fish - In women's clothing
Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
Lasagna - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a state of trance
None of the above - With George Bush and his wife


4. What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put leeches on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the toupee off
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive out


5. What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My best friend
White - My father
Grey - Bill Clinton
Brown - My fart balloon
Purple - My mustard soufflé
Red - Donald Duck
Blue - My avocado plant
Yellow - My penpal in Ghana
Other - That Extreme Home Makeover sucks


8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your ring
Yellow - Your love letters
Red - Your Darth Vader-poster
Black - Your tame stone
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from LA
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your contact book
Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
Purple - Your old lottery coupons
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your memories from the military service


9. The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo
C/D - The oil stocks
E/F - Your neighbour Martin
G/H - My virginity
I/J - The results of your blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your suicide note
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - David's tricot outfits
Y/Z - Your grades from college


10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Always will remember
C/D - Never will forget
E/F - Always wanted to break
G/H - Never openly mocked
I/J - Always have felt dirty before
K/L - Will tell the authorities about
M/N - Told in my confession today about
O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about
Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about
S/T - Get sick when I think of
U/V - Always will try to forget
W/X - Am better off without
Y/Z - Never liked


11. What do you prefer to drink?
Water- Our friendship
Beer - Senility
Soft drink - A new life as a clone
Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
Milk - The apartment building
Wine - Cocaine abuse
Cider - A passionate interest for mice
Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations
Mineral water - Embarrassing rash
Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism
Whisky - To ruin the second world war
Other - To hate the Boston Celtics


12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm regards
USA - Best regards
England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
Spain - Go and drown yourself
China - Disgusting regards
Germany - With ease
Japan - Go burn
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt - F**k off now
France - In pain
  • Mood: Rant
  • Listening to: blasting my eardrums 2 Insanity
  • Reading: Fablehaven
  • Watching: You ._.
  • Playing: Imscared
  • Eating: Nutella owo
  • Drinking: watah!
Add a Comment:
 
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
where's 6 and 7? :0 xD
Reply
:iconsobbie-chan:
Sobbie-Chan Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
I thought i did it xD
Reply
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
no 6 and 7 for the bottom part like 6. what color is your bedroom?
red-...
green-...
f*ck-...[WHAT?]

Like that, you did it on the top though xD
Reply
:iconsobbie-chan:
Sobbie-Chan Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013
Ah fahk xD MUST EDIT IT!!!
Reply
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
lol xD
Reply
:iconcreamstar13:
Creamstar13 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Student General Artist
FUCK
Reply
:iconsobbie-chan:
Sobbie-Chan Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
CREAM NU DER WERE LIIIIEEEESSS!!!
Reply
:iconcreamstar13:
Creamstar13 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Student General Artist
THEY BETTER BE
Reply
:iconsobbie-chan:
Sobbie-Chan Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013
They weerrrrrree!!!! :iconcomebackplz:
Reply
:iconcreamstar13:
Creamstar13 Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Student General Artist
:iconbabycomebackplz:
Reply
Add a Comment: